{"id":6200,"date":"2025-09-30T16:20:00","date_gmt":"2025-09-30T14:20:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/fenestra.sk\/?p=6200"},"modified":"2026-02-11T16:41:26","modified_gmt":"2026-02-11T15:41:26","slug":"why-women-dont-leave-25","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/fenestra.sk\/en\/why-women-dont-leave-25\/","title":{"rendered":"Why Don\u2019t Women Leave Their Abusive Partners?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">One of the most common reactions to women experiencing intimate partner violence is the question: <strong>\u201cWhy doesn\u2019t she leave?\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">We also often hear statements such as:<br\/><em>\u201cI would have left a long time ago.\u201d<\/em><br\/><em>\u201cI don\u2019t understand why she doesn\u2019t get a divorce.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">These reactions may seem logical \u2013 from the outside, the solution can appear simple. In reality, however, leaving an abusive relationship is not simple at all. Women have many real and serious reasons why they do not leave, or why they may return to an abusive partner repeatedly.  <\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Fear of the Abusive Partner\u2019s Reaction<\/strong><\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">One of the main reasons is <strong>fear<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Many abusive men tell their partners they will \u201cdestroy\u201d them, that they will lose their children or their job, that they will \u201cmake them look crazy\u201d and have them institutionalized. They threaten to harm the woman, the children, themselves, or people close to her. Some threaten to kill their partner or the children, or to commit suicide if she leaves.  <\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">These threats are not empty words. Especially men who are highly possessive and controlling may mean them seriously. <\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The period of leaving an abusive relationship \u2013 and the time shortly after \u2013 <strong>is one of the most dangerous<\/strong>. Femicides committed by partners unfortunately also occur in Slovakia. They often happen weeks or even months after a woman has left, or at the moment she announces that she wants to leave, divorce, or files for divorce.  <\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">This is why it can be dangerous when people advise a woman: \u201cJust leave.\u201d<br\/>Many women do leave abusive relationships \u2013 but it is crucial that they can do so safely.<\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">One option is to contact <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.zastavmenasilie.gov.sk\/\">helplines and organizations<\/a><\/strong> that provide specialized help and support to women experiencing intimate partner violence. Together, they can prepare a <strong>safety plan<\/strong>. The safety of women and their children must always come first.  <\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Economic Dependence and Practical Barriers<\/strong><\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Another common reason is concern about whether a woman can financially support herself and her children, where she would live, and whether she could manage on her own.<\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Economic abuse is often part of abusive behaviour. Many women do not have access to shared finances and\/or do not control their own income. They may not be able to save money because the abusive partner manages and controls all financial resources.  <\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Especially women with small children and limited family or social support may face very real barriers. Leaving requires housing, income, and childcare. Not every woman has these resources immediately available.  <\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">That is why it is essential that forms of help and support take these barriers into account and assist women in leaving safely and gradually rebuilding a life free from violence.<\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Feelings of Guilt and Shame<\/strong><\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Many women say that it is not only fear or finances that make leaving difficult, but also <strong>feelings of guilt and shame<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Abusive partners often blame women for their own behaviour. They claim that if the woman had not \u201cprovoked\u201d them, \u201cmade mistakes,\u201d or \u201cbehaved differently,\u201d the violence would not have happened. <\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">This is not true.<br\/><strong>The responsibility for violence always lies with the person who commits it.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">However, feelings of guilt and shame are often reinforced by the surrounding environment. Women are still told that they \u201cfailed to keep the family together,\u201d as if this were solely their responsibility. Such beliefs shift responsibility for the violence onto women and minimize the actions of the abusive partner.  <\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>He Is Not a Stranger<\/strong><\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Leaving is also difficult because the abusive partner is not a stranger. He is often the closest person in her life, the father of her children, someone she loved or may still love. <\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The relationship usually did not begin with violence. In the beginning, it was romantic and full of hope. Abusive partners often alternate abusive behaviour with periods of calm and seemingly normal partnership. This pattern can be confusing and may sustain hope that \u201cthis time it will be different.\u201d   <\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Other Barriers<\/strong><\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">There are additional reasons that may prevent women from leaving: disability or health conditions, language barriers (for example, foreign women or women whose first language is not Slovak), insecure residence status, older age combined with poor health, lack of available help and support in their region, and others.<\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>So Why Doesn\u2019t She Leave?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The most common reasons include:<\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Fear for her life and the safety<\/strong> of her children.<\/p>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>The risk of escalation<\/strong> of violence during and after leaving<strong>.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Economic dependence<\/strong> and<strong> lack of housing<\/strong> or support.<\/p>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Feelings of guilt, shame<\/strong>, and blame from the partner and the wider environment<strong>.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Other disadvantages<\/strong> \u2013 health-related, language, age-related, or social.<\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Every woman\u2019s story is individual and unique. There is no single universal reason why women do not leave \u2013 there are many, and they are real. There is also no simple solution. Ending an abusive relationship is a process. The safety of women and their children must remain the top priority throughout.   <\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If you or someone in your surroundings is experiencing intimate partner violence, please contact helplines and counselling and intervention centres for women experiencing violence and victims of domestic violence.<\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:50px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>Activities of Fenestra Counselling and Intervention Centre in 2025 are supported by the Ministry of Justice of the Slovak Republic through the grant program for providing professional assistance to victims of crime, the Ministry of Labour, Social Affairs and Family of the Slovak Republic within the grant for promoting gender equality and equal opportunities, and the Ko\u0161ice Self-Governing Region.<\/em><\/p>\n\n<div style=\"height:20px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em> Fenestra bears sole responsibility for the content of this article. <\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>One of the most common reactions to women experiencing intimate partner violence is the question: \u201cWhy doesn\u2019t she leave?\u201d We also often hear statements such as:\u201cI would have left a long time ago.\u201d\u201cI don\u2019t understand why she doesn\u2019t get a divorce.\u201d These reactions may seem logical \u2013 from the outside, the solution can appear simple. [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":6209,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"set","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[40],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6200","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-news"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v25.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Why Don\u2019t Women Leave Their Abusive Partners? - FENESTRA<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"http:\/\/fenestra.sk\/en\/why-women-dont-leave-25\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Why Don\u2019t Women Leave Their Abusive Partners? - FENESTRA\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"One of the most common reactions to women experiencing intimate partner violence is the question: \u201cWhy doesn\u2019t she leave?\u201d We also often hear statements such as:\u201cI would have left a long time ago.\u201d\u201cI don\u2019t understand why she doesn\u2019t get a divorce.\u201d These reactions may seem logical \u2013 from the outside, the solution can appear simple. 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